Thoughts Along The Journey

Many of us have quoted this verse from Proverbs: “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.” Good counselors provide the needed input and wisdom we need. However, I find that I will often seek the counsel of those who will agree with me and avoid the counsel that may raise questions about the direction or decision I am considering.

In the book, Thanks for the Feedback, the authors state that the problem with feedback comes not from the one giving it but from the one receiving it.  Simply because the receiver is not sure what to do with, or how to sift, the feedback that is given. Learning to sift feedback to discover the kernel of truth embedded in what was said is an essential component of learning to really ‘hear’ others. What others share with us, and even those with whom we may disagree, can contain elements of truth that are essential for whatever we may be in the process of deciding.

Add in the element of cultural difference(s) and the process becomes a bit more complex. The principle, however, remains the same. If we can learn to sift the feedback that is given, by expending added effort to understand the context from which it is given, we can benefit from this new angle of insight. An insight that we perhaps would not have received from those within our own cultural context.

In the long run, and in a changing global context, we need feedback from people close to us, farther away from us culturally, and from those who see things differently than we do.

Now all that is easy to say in theoretical terms.  Seeking feedback (input) from others will mean going out and asking for it, so that we can practice the skill of hearing others well.

Filed under: Crossing cultures, Feedback, Listening |